Day 58: Your Future Husband Is Waiting Downstairs!

Two people outside decided it would be a good decision to have a yelling match in the street around midnight so none of us slept incredibly well. It is so strange, a lot of the noisiest times I have experienced here have been in the middle of the night; prayer over loudspeakers, fighting, ping-pong, car alarms, it is so bizarre!

 

            Despite not sleeping through the whole night I woke up with a bit more energy the past two days and enjoyed the morning getting computer work done at the flat. Adrie finished entering data into the government book (can I get an Amen?!) before lunch so we were feeling good about that. Biana came to lunch and asked if I wanted to join her in a little excursion to the MCC office in Jos where she was having a meeting. I was able to go and meet Brenda, a woman who helped me prepare for this trip via e-mail, and hear more about what her family is doing here. Next week a group of MCC doctors from the US and Canada arrive to partner with Faith Alive for a little while. They have invited Adrie and myself to join in on their classes, ministry visits, and other cultural activities, which we eagerly jumped in on. It will be nice to have some more learning experiences here and spend some time with Mennonites! (I miss my friends...) Dr. Chris spent a good while in the car explaining that he had picked out a Nigerian man for me to marry. Not only was her a wonderful man, he told me, but this way I will have to come back to Jos permanently. He smiled really big. “Dr. Chris,” I told him, “what would you have done if I actually bought this?” He started to laugh and replied, “I guess I would have made a few phone calls.” He is such a joker! Apparently he brings up marriage with most young American women to see their reaction. “The last person I tried this with broke down in tears!” he informed me. Luckily my blonde roots only grow so deep!

 

            Back at the Clinic we caught up on e-mails and are moving closer to a final decision regarding our journey. God is making it clear what we need to do, we just need to take that peace and move forward with it. We got to sit with Dan’s son Chris for a few minutes while Dr. Ben played a cartoon with a hippo singing “The Lion Sleeps Tonight” four times through on his laptop to keep the little one entertained. It was precious! Since it is Halloween back home (no one here celebrates it. And what would give them reason to?) we decided to celebrate with a trip to Tamarash for groceries and chocolate bars. Treat! Baba made a delightful dinner (suna abinchi mashed dan kali: this food is called mashed potatoes. My Hausa is getting better!) and we ended our long tiring week with a movie, some chocolate, and an early bedtime.

 

            I love knowing that we serve a God who knows what we can handle. All three of us made it through this week without any feelings of hatred, confusion, or depression at the end of it! God is good!

Day 57: Your Hausa Sounds Good. Good Trying.

The girls let me sleep in for a while knowing that having a quiet morning at the flat would help me recover from the past couple of days. I woke up at eight, made myself some breakfast, and spent the rest of the time before lunch editing my article and doing some homework. It was one of the first chances I had felt free to sit and think so I got some much-needed processing of emotions underway. It is funny how life changes so rapidly and God leaves it up to us how we handle those situations. More than anything I am just confused so I spent some time talking to God; he knows best what comes next in this great adventure.

 

            We met Baba outside before lunch and he walked up to us with a serious expression. “I no make lunch today, you say yesterday you didn’t want lunch today.” Adrie and I took him at his word for a second before realizing once he started laughing that, yet again, Baba was keeping our time here entertaining. He is teaching me some Hausa and I am on my way to becoming fluent. I can say How are you, I am fine, Good morning, See you tomorrow, This food was good, and Potatoes. I am desperately hoping that one morning I can go to the market and try out all my phrases!

 

            The Clinic was much less hectic today than it was earlier this week so everyone was much more at ease. Prayer meeting was an hour-long dance party with Jesus--singing, clapping, passing around babies that moms had to bring to work with them today. It was a great time! Nigerians really know how to worship through dance; I hope that my white-girl moves don’t hinder the fullness of my praise. When the music stopped we all went back to our respective tasks around the Clinic and I found myself back at the computer making final changes and keeping in touch with people back home. It was a relaxing afternoon and I was glad to get some needed venting off my chest and back to the proper people via cyberspace. It is particularly hard to process life when a majority of the people you need to talk to are thousands of miles away...

 

            Once we felt good about our daily tasks we headed back to the flat for a round of pilates, dinner, and chat on the balcony. It was especially pretty tonight since NEPA was not around and the stars were easier to see. Adrie and I enjoyed our own dance party before catching the tail-end of Bridget Jones’s Diary and heading off to bed. Things are looking better.

Day 56: How Are You Really Doing?

I wasn’t sure how the morning would look but things started out well. I woke up to my alarm, had a good breakfast, put on a cute outfit, and even decided to wear my hair down. Things felt right as Adrie and I walked out of the flat but I have grown to learn that things change in a minute when life gets going. The lady on the corner who sells corn, Frances, brought her screaming first grader up to me as we walked past and asked if I could make sure she got to school ok. Apparently the two of them were having a rough morning and her daughter sobbed the entire walk to primary school at the church across from Faith Alive. When Adrie and I got upstairs for staff meeting we were both a little on edge. Dr. Chris told everyone that they needed to head out to department meetings and, as Adrie walked to the pharmacy, I felt it all rising inside of me. I found a good quiet spot on the second floor to sit and cry.

 

            I have grown to realize I don’t share my negative feelings well with others, which is funny since I was such a melancholy child. Sitting in the hallway by myself I wiped my tears and talked to God for a bit before wandering back upstairs. Luckily Biana spotted me first and pulled me into her office where I was able to talk things through with her and Adrie. It felt good to put into words all the things running through my head. I decided a morning in the flat would give me some room to breathe so I finished writing my article for Fresno First, watched a bit of Anchorman with Adrie, and wandered down for lunch.

 

            Right after lunch Greg took me back to Faith Alive where I sat outside of the longest meeting known to man, checking e-mails and talking with Felicia. Biana had asked me to show her my article once it was written but I realized soon after the doctors walked out of her office that she was having as crazy of a day as I was. I made a couple of phone calls, not nearly as weepy today, and was glad to see that God has already started making peace out of potentially turbulent situations. It is impossible for things to stay the same when you are in another country--life keeps going and God keeps moving people to his will! Shola wandered up to say hello and ended up staying for a good hour with my laptop looking through the past few years of my life on iphoto and choosing songs to download from itunes. It definitely cheered me up, though he had no idea I was in a distressed state.

 

            The end of the workday came almost two hours later than normal and the three of us dragged home for dinner. Amos had asked if he could come over and bring us some barbequed Nigerian fish, which Biana respectfully agreed to. None of us were in high spirits but made sure to make the most of our meal with Amos, his wife, and his daughter. The fish was pretty tasty--instead of normal “River Fish” this was tilapia--and the Nigerians voluntarily ate the heads. We washed up quickly after they left and headed upstairs to get comfortable.

 

            Not long after we got back to the flat we heard a knock at the door and were greeted by Pastor Ben, Morning Star and, after a few minutes, Doris. We sat in the living room and chatted for a bit and Ben sensed something was up. He asked me straight out how I was doing and I told him quite honestly that I was not doing well. As any good pastor would he stood up to address us, but as any good friend would he did not preach at us but instead shared his thoughts on life. He told us that it seems to be the hardest points in his life where God speaks the loudest and that we all must endure trials to make anything work. Life does not work without conflict and questioning, he said, because that would make us believe we have all the answers. Instead, God uses these times to remind us that we need to trust in him because only he knows what is best for our lives. It was very encouraging, and definitely something I needed to hear at this point in my journey. As more and more yawning appeared around the room Ben decided it was time to go. He prayed over each of us, we gave Doris and Morning Star hugs goodnight, and went to bed feeling less in control but much more at peace.

Day 55: And Cait, Even With All That Has Happened, I Still Love My Life!

It was a bright and beautiful morning and I accidentally slept through my alarm. No worries, I woke up thirty minutes later than usual but still had enough time to get ready. I was extra bubbly, listening to music while I put my somewhat frizzy hair up, and walked down to the Clinic ready to go. Thankfully I was needed in the pharmacy this morning so I counted pills and helped Grace plan which hairstyle she wants for her December wedding. Ibuprofin and wedding magazines: who knew that working with medicine could be so much fun?

 

            Biana had asked Helen earlier if she would be willing to share her testimony with me to bring back to Fresno First. She happily agreed and met me before lunchtime on the planters in front of the Clinic. Before speaking she sold me a few yards of fabric (that woman knows how to sweet talk!) for a skirt and started into her story. It was absolutely amazing. She is a strong woman in spirit and faith; and her testimony is such an encouragement looking at the darkness surrounding HIV. I jotted down notes, gave her a hug as she went back to work with Doctor Isilowe, and wandered down to the flat for some needed lunch.

 

            After filing up on mashed potatoes and veggies Adrie and I had fun with photo booth. There is something so entertaining about taking pictures on the computer! We walked back down to Faith Alive and she stopped by Blessing’s shop to ask if she could be interviewed next for our little project. I wrote part of my article in Biana’s office and took time for e-mailing. I read a particularly difficult message and had an equally difficult phone call before falling apart back in the office. Thankfully I live with two amazing women who I was able to talk with, pray with, and find joy with. God is in control of situations, not me, and it is good to remember that from time to time. Still, it took a lot of energy out of the rest of my day.

 

            Back home the three of us enjoyed dinner (Baba force-fed the last of the pineapple to Adrie!) and decided that we were in desperate need of stress relief. We had a chat while our food settled and then pulled out the cardio pilates video where we stretched and kicked our way through questions. I took a long bucket bath afterwards, called home, and talked to Adrie before collapsing from the day. Sleep is good, and God is better.

 

            I’m on the up and up...

Day 54: Why Is It That You Can Sing And Dance To These Songs With Kids But Adults Just Laugh At You?

It is getting harder to get out of bed every morning since, a) I have adjusted to the time difference and am staying up later, b) It is getting a little cooler in the mornings so being in bed feels good, and c) My dreams are so realistic that it takes a few minutes to register where I am once i open my eyes. Nonetheless I am able to finally roll out of bed with a smile ready for cereal, yogurt, and a good day ahead of me!

 

            Determined to finish The Book as quick as possible Adrie and I went to work this morning with both our original government book and a second one for the patient information that didn’t fit. It gave me a good chance to turn on my itunes to rock out to Mates of State and the Beatles while I worked. I got the overflow done by lunchtime (mind you the computer team messed up on the numbering so there were huge empty chunks) so I felt pretty good about that. Baba made his excellent fries for lunch and I was able to get a letter typed up to e-mail later in the day before heading down to the Clinic.

 

            I was hoping to catch Helen at some point to interview her for a project the three of us are working on for Fresno First but I wasn’t able to find her. Sholah had run into me yesterday afternoon and asked if I wouldn’t mind stopping by the lab when I got a chance during the week to write down the lyrics for the Mustard Seed Song. He is the children’s leader at his church and is always looking for new songs, stories, and games for his kids to enjoy. I walked in to the lab to say Hello and hand him the lyrics when he asked if I wouldn’t mind singing it for him so he could get the tune down right. It was a little strange singing and dancing while people around me did blood work in white coats, but hey, you only live once. He said his kids were going to love the song and hoped he could learn more fun songs with hand motions...Sholah was talking to the right girl. I was able to teach him Lord I Lift Your Name On High and Waves Of Mercy there at his work station and this time he agreed to stand up and try it out with me. We drew a bit of a crowd since all the others working in the lab wanted to come over and watch our performance; we even had people clapping. I reminded Sholah that I had tons of other songs in my head that we could work on later. He tried to thank me but I told him that the people who deserved the thanks are the past generations of Timber Mountain counselors who sing those crazy songs every week. (Of course, if they were in front of a group of Nigerian lab technicians it may look a little different than being in front of their normal crowd of campers covered in dirt.)

 

            After some quick e-mailing I walked back to the flat where I collapsed on my bed for a half hour, only to be woken by a huge fight going on across the street. People love to yell here--this husband and wife must have been the yelling champions. Dinner was nice and I am glad that Baba is trying to teach me more Hausa. It sounds pretty ugly coming from my mouth, but we’re making progress. “You try good!” as Baba always tells me. He wanted to know if I was staying for Christmas and when I told him I would be back home then he asked if he could make me his special Christmas dinner before leaving. That sounded delightful, so I agreed and he told me that it is a secret until it is on the table. I bet it’s something exciting...

 

            Back upstairs Adrie, Biana, and I lounged around the living room (Biana recuperating from a long typical Monday) and talked about whatever hit our minds: tattoos, camping, church, all things near and dear to my heart. We laughed a lot as we reminisced about hiding spots in our old sanctuary and boogie-boarding in Cayucos. There is something special about looking back on exciting events while you are in the midst of another. I know I will be talking to these two in a few years asking, “Remember that time in Nigeria when...”

 

            What I would give to play flashlight tag in our old sanctuary one more time.

Day 53: I Don’t See Any Need To Change Out Of Pajamas.

Missing church is not looked highly upon here. It seems that the times you miss a Sunday service require an understandable emergency, and even then people will ask you about it to verify. Biana and Adrie were not feeling very good this morning, Biana getting over a cold and Adrie having a sore back, so we thought it best not to go to church. I know we will get asked about it by everyone we work with tomorrow morning--maybe we should think of some good stories to make excuses out of.

 

            Since we didn’t leave the flat this morning I spent time with God reading through the Sermon on the Mount, thinking through the Lord’s Prayer particularly, and talking to him about what’s been going on. Sometimes I forget about God’s role when I get distracted with life events, so it’s good for me to have a quiet time every once in a while to refocus. I eventually picked up The Glass Castle to see where the Walls childhood was going and ended up finishing the entire book by lunchtime. I just love memoirs! For lunchtime I put together some potato quesadillas out of our leftovers, which turned out to be pretty tasty, and watched a movie with Adrie that was on tv.

 

            Adrie and I wandered down to the Clinic in the afternoon to check up on e-mails and do some computer work. I noticed I had three new messages in my inbox and ended up crying after opening each one. The first was Kori and Doug’s wedding invitation, which made me incredibly happy, followed by a couple pictures of Gavin he took for me last night. That one made me cry the hardest since he looks like such a grown-up with his beard--plus a big sister needs to spend time with her brother! The last was a detailed update on life from Matthew Wallace. I was so excited to read and see all that was going on (in Fresno and Sydney) and have been blessed to have family and friends who want to keep me updated when I am far from home, even if just for a few weeks.

 

            Baba cooked a good dinner and after eating Adrie and I enjoyed our second dance party/sing-a-long in her room. We concluded our time with “Part of Your World” complete with the princess-voice and synchronized twirling. Biana told us that Father of the Bride had just come on in the living room so the three of us drank hot cocoa and watched that. With all the wedding plans and recent engagements going on in my friend’s lives it made the movie seem a little more real than before! Hooray for love! NEPA has been a little bipolar today so we decided on going to bed at a time when there was no power but just recently had all the lights switch on again. I’ll turn off the lights once i am done typing this; electricity or not I am going to sleep!

Day 52: Well, So Far Today We’ve Done Absolutely Nothing...

Saturdays always come as a huge breath of fresh air in our sometimes chaotic schedules here. It’s nice to know that it is the one day where we allowed to have no plans and no fear of plans sneaking up on us. Don’t get me wrong, it is great to have crazy surprises during the week, but it is also necessary to get a chance to sit and do nothing.

 

            Since I have had the pleasure of reading real stories here (not textbooks) I was able to start the Glass Castle this morning and am already halfway through. I eat up any sort of memoir, especially bizarre ones. I just love it when people are willing to share their story. Jeanette Walls in this particular piece is reflecting on her unusual childhood of living in various desert cities while her carefree parents drove the family into poverty trying to find gold and make a career out of painting. I am always reminded how blessed I am to have grown up with the particular memories I have, with parents who didn’t expect me to start cooking my own meals at three years old or move in the middle of the night to another city to escape bill collectors.

 

            After a bit of reading (I woke up really early) I made myself some gluten-free pancakes and enjoyed some piece and quiet around the apartment. NEPA deserted us around eight so I took a bucket bath by lantern and finally felt like my hair was normal. With all the dust swirling around these days it is hard to feel particularly clean, even when you are only outside for a short amount of time. I took a quick nap before lunch to make up for waking up so early and wandered down for a good lunch with Adrie and Biana.

 

            Adrie and I took the afternoon to do some in-depth e-mailing at the Clinic. It is hard to find the time to get in touch with everyone you think about during the day simply because we only have internet access on the third floor of Faith Alive. Contacting people from the comfort of our flat is out of the question, which is where I normally remember what I need to say to people. I talked to my family for a little while, got updated on facebook, and did some browsing for travel costs at this point in time. I don’t think I will be able to afford another trip for quite some time--even if I’m just going to another part of California!

 

            Baba made us a nice dinner and the three of us headed back up to the flat when NEPA decided to come home. Biana found something interesting on tv while Adrie and I, like old times, cooped ourselves up in her room and drank hot cocoa while listening to music and telling stories. We decided it was a good time for a dance party so we each chose a few songs to play and sing along to. I think that should count as our physical activity for the day. I’ll go to bed with a million songs running through my head.