Waking up this morning was a difficult task seeing as I was struggling to breathe through my nose. This crazy dust is trying to get the best of me! Adrie and I both weren’t feeling the greatest and were not sure who wanted to stay home more this morning and work on The Book. We came to the agreement that she would be at the flat while I went to discipleship class and the pharmacy, then switch in the afternoon. So after a quick scrub with a bucket bath I made my way down to the sewing school and played with the babies for a few minutes before things got started. I wasn’t feeling the greatest, but good enough to stand and sing, when Adrie appeared in the door telling me we were given a new assignment.
Task: Archived File Sorting. Motivation Level: 0. Adrie and I were given keys to the archived file closest (which we put together a few weeks ago) and told to look through every file and pull out any patient that had been misplaced, meaning they were seen in 2008. The job had already been done a week or two before we arrived in Jos, but Dr. Chris was positive that some were missed and the hundreds of files needed to be looked at again. In the stuffy room we opened the paper files and read their patient history checking for dates before sticking them back in the correct placement in the box. I have been getting more frustrated with being told what to do with the added line of “...even though no one will look at this again” before we begin. Do they even want us here? With the amount of files we knew it would take us at least two full days to get it done. It was hot, we were tired, and for the first time since I have been in Jos I started to feel really bad. Not bad as in angry, bad as in discouraged and sick and sad and...maybe overwhelmed is a better word. So I looked at Adrie and started to cry.
It is interesting when you have those moments in life where everything hits you at once. Today, sitting in the archived file room, I hit the wall. I have been holding in a lot of feelings about things going on back at home and new experiences here piling up within me. With my Aunt being sick, and missing my family and friends, and tedious tasks at the Clinic, and hearing exciting news about engagements and pregnancies, and spending time with people dying or imprisoned or confused, it suddenly all became too much to handle. I was feeling very far removed from my normal life and, on top of that, not enjoying my current state. My head was swimming, and my heart was starting to drown.
Adrie gave me the room to cry and listened to my frustrations with great tenderness. She made the executive decision to head back for lunch early, which gave me a little time to lie down and talk to God. When lunch came around Jon and Kristen picked up that we had a tough morning. They spent the meal asking questions, listening, and giving some wise advice. Their three-month period is coming to a close and they admitted to having the same feelings at multiple times during their stay. But, they reminded me, God doesn’t call people to do things that are pointless. We are here for a reason and he will bless us for following his will. Kristen handed me a letter from a woman I talked to at the Clinic yesterday who wanted to thank me for taking to time to sit and chat before leaving for her daily walk. Of course.
I was feeling a little better before prayer meeting and enjoyed Team D’s message on prayer. Jon and Kristen have done a wonderful job of approaching controversial topics here in a loving way with lots of Scriptural support. They talked about how people believe if they ask hard enough and with enough faith that God will answer their prayers, when really God wants to answer requests that are going to help the person grow. Prayer for wealth and physical healing are major parts of Christian life here, so it was a bold statement to say that maybe God doesn’t want a person to gain more money. We looked at the Lord’s Prayer and had a time of talking to the Lord together. When they were done sharing Uncle Thomas got up and seriously addressed that it was that it was almost the dreaded “ember” months (Nov-ember, Dec-ember). He told the crowd that these two months were the most deadly of the year because the “demons have a low blood bank” so they attack Christians. He said we needed to pray for the 1,700 people they were planning to kill in Nigeria over that amount of time. Whoa. I was really confused. Thankfully Pastor Ben got up to tell the staff that we need to rid of African superstition in our Christian lives and reminded us that these two months were the same as any other out of the year. It was the first time I had seen two Nigerian pastors disagree openly, and was glad to see that most seemed to side with Ben’s rationale.
After prayer meeting I was still recovering from this morning. After e-mails I was blessed to have a skype conversation with one Miss Louisa Gee, which brought such Scottish joy to my American heart! It was wonderful to see and talk to one of my best friends and our conversation really cheered me up. I went to dinner feeling much better and enjoyed our table talk about social issues in the States. Biana helped out my mood even more by letting Adrie and I know that a) She wasn’t going to let us finish the archived file project because it was not worth it, b) Saturday night we are attempting Mexican food, and c) The three of us should have hot cocoa before going to sleep.
As poorly as this day began there is no way to compare to how wonderfully it came to a close. Adrie, Biana, and I got ourselves mugs of hot cocoa and cinnamon rice cakes and set ourselves up out on the balcony. It was a full moon tonight and just as we sat down a lightning storm started in the distance. We spent over an hour sitting and sipping our hot chocolate in the cool breeze and talking about life. It was so nice to have girl talk, and even more nice to sit in silence and watch the clouds light up just above the rooftops to the east. It will be a wonderful day when one of us will look at the other two and say, Remember that time we chatted about this over cocoa during a Nigerian storm?
“With quiet words I’ll lead you in and out of the dark...”
Thanks God.
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